Mr.Friday ~

Dear Mr.Friday,

I can no longer hide it. Do you really have to keep me waiting that long? There are 7 days in a week, and all you can spare for me is a day, and it’s Friday! I know, you’re busy with your life, and maybe, just maybe, you want me to focus on my craft as well. But, didn’t it ever cross your mind how much I miss you everyday? Just a smiley, a simple smiley is more than enough, just don’t ignore me totally.

Did you say you “like” me? Did you just say that because someone betrayed me and told you that I have a crush on you? I missed one day, and everything was twisted. Can you be honest, for one more time? It’s an understatement to ask you to be honest, coz’ you never lied even once. Am I right? I don’t care what others are saying, it is your words I will always believe, except when you said you “like” me.

I should be happy about it, but how come I can’t feel anything at all? Can you please explain to me why? Why did you have to say those words? Did I do something wrong?

Damn! I miss you, and you know it? I don’t need to say anything coz’ you can read my mind. For some reason, I am really fascinated at how good you are with timing. You were always right there, at the right time, saying the right things. You never failed to capture every bits of me.

To end this, please, if you can really read my mind. Please, don’t let me wait that long. I don’t have enough patience. I should trust you. Trust what’s with ‘us’. No ifs and No buts. Okay.Okay. I will try my best. I will just sleep early. ~

Okay. If space and distance is all you need, then FINE.
I’ll see what I can do about it.

I will surely MISS YOU.. A LOT…
your wish is granted.

Ms. Impatient

~ Ms. WC

Just when I thought I conquered the waves, I found myself back in the middle of the sea.
I was okay. I am fine. I learned to accept that I cannot change anything anymore. That he just passed by to teach me something. I no longer wanted to know my place. I got used to the pain, that it made me numb. I was at the momentum of regaining myself. Then,a surprise surprised me.

I knew it. There was something. There was really something going on. What I felt during those moments were real. Supposedly, that revelation should make me happy, right? But how come, here I am, lost… confused… Am I over thinking again? Honestly, I just miss him. I miss him that I can no longer hide it. There are a lot of things I want to say, but I don’t know how. Or if he’s even interested to know my story. I miss him that once again, it breaks my heart.

I’m scared and shy to admit the truth. I’m not expecting anything, all I wanted to know is where am I. It may be mutual, but that’s it. I want to admit the truth. Can I have my turn? A second chance? I will not ruin it this time. I want to push my luck and see where it will take me. I no longer want to shed tears. I’ve cried a lot this last two months. And it’s all because of him.

Can I hug you?
Can we just sit, back and breathe?
We don’t need any words, presence is more that enough
Let’s waste time together, can we?

Thanks for embracing my imperfections.

Can I just love you, if its not too much to ask?
Don’t worry, I’m not asking you to do the same.
Just let me do it for you, until I can.
Please?

 

The cold treatment

There are days when he make me feel like I don’t exist. I thought I’m strong enough to tolerate it and let it pass by. I was wrong, AGAIN. I slept with heavy eyes. I wear this wide smile all day long pretending to be okay. My thoughts keep on betraying me. I’m trying my best to focus, keep myself busy from important stuff, but my eyes can’t control what it can see, nor my heart choose what it can feel, I always end up finding something that reminds me of him; that name and the name I used to call him. I can’t help but wonder what goes inside his head; am I part of it? Do I ever cross his mind? Do I really don’t deserve to be noticed by him? 

Am I alive or a lie? Am I just complicating my life? I just committed myself to pain and happiness, as long as its with him. This situation I dragged myself into kills my entirety and some days, my head feels so numb. 

Where are we really? What am I to you, honestly? I’ve made a decision to no longer question that status thing and instead be grateful to what’s happening. I did my best to breathe cool air, but whenever I see him looking the other way makes me grasps polluted air. I can handle a day or two of no communication, just please don’t look the other way. I’d rather be slapped, than see you looking away, like I did something wrong.

I can feel your efforts. I’m sorry if I’m not being cooperative. I want to whisper how badly I miss those times we walk together. Those… Those moments I genuinely feel HAPPY and CONTENTED. Arrgghhh.. I miss those times, most especially you. 

You’re already a part of me. I don’t care if I’m not in yours, I do hope I make sense to you. Can we still be friends even at a distance? Will everything change in a blink of an eye? Will I disappear like I didn’t existed? 

Those thoughts keep haunting me. Should I ask you, then? Can’t you just answer them, since I feel like you can read my mind. 
I’m really sad, very sad. Glad that I can wear a mask. I will smile until you’re here, and will still smile when you’re gone. Just a fake one. No one will notice the difference, anyway. ~